This is a story about a founder named Alexa (ALEXA JOKES NOT WELCOME)…

It began in my two piece stretch pants and matching turtleneck, in my first grade classroom, when my teacher, Ms. Roses, looked at me, and asked “what do you want to be when you grow up?” I looked up at her, and said “I want to manage sales teams, build revenue operations, and sell B2B newsletter media space and SaaS to small startups, Ms. Roses.” She was like “umm you can be anything you want to be,” and probably called my mom.

Jokes. I wrote that I wanted to be HAPPY. When I graduated Boston University in 2014, I started frantically looking for jobs, sending out my waitressing and intern resume to the world’s biggest media agency for jobs like CEO of Edelman and Head of PR at United Talent. The very bitter taste of naive rejection.

I finally swallowed that pride and saved my ego for other occasions, and applied for a secretary role at a Business Intelligence, Indemnification company, where I sat in a cubicle online shopping not knowing what the hell that was or how to use the phone.

Eventually I crawled to NYC, and found myself with a little more confidence, but a lot less money, and got a job working for a boutique in-house production company that made commercials for tech startups. Despite working 7am to sometimes 2am, I was given the unofficial title of director of everything: sales, account manager, project manager, casting, props, set discovery, caterer, and requested a lobotomy instead of a raise.

BUT I was getting my feat wet in the B2B SMB space, learning the ins and outs of SaaS, marketing, sales and growth. I was out every day and night making connections with companies and individuals and making sure to get all of their numbers. I was doing it Daft Punk style: work it, make it, do it, makes us harder, better, faster, stronger.

Unexpectedly, poached by the great Gary Vee machine, VaynerMedia, I couldn’t believe that one interview, for which I had no experience running any kind influencer brand partnerships team, I was given a hefty salary and told to figure it out. So I walked the walked and talked the talk, but the clients were unhappy, the employees unhappier, and the team dissolved, and in 2016, I made the decision to never step foot in an office every again after crying five times a week alternating days between an am and pm cries. #balance

I finally found my footing in a remote setting and moved to Miami (getting fired from my first two jobs because I literally thought remote work wasn’t real, despite benefits + salary, and stayed in bed moving my mouse around with a lazy finger, possibly going a full year without brushing my teeth). But something clicked and I started stepping up, putting on make up, gettin the hair did, and getting busy with it. I got a job with Jason Calacanis’ Inside.com and worked under my mentor and friend Kevin Curry, doing full cycle sales, selling the biggest deal in company history to Outreach.io, as they became a unicorn, for a custom creation of a full newsletter, then a 46k deal to Goldman Sachs for a buyout of the Inside VC newsletter.

I began to realize I had a skill, I was confident, funny, and damn good at sales strategy, landing target accounts and bringing in hella money. I left Inside (tbc) and build out brand new rev opps, like TheFutureParty under LA agency, NVE, brining in 124k in the first two quarters, up from 5k in their two years as a company. I begun to develop a sales and revenue encyclopedia, a method, a philosophy, and found confidence in closing 50k+ deals on Friday’s of the last day of the last month of the quarter. I started relationship building, gathering my leads, started to read, listen and ended up getting repeatedly poached by clients like MarketerHire and Flatfile who were looking for leaders for their outbound team.

Throughout all of this, and a second round Inside.com and hopping around place to place, spreading the Good Word of Alexa Zuroff, I had been coaching founders and execs of 1-10 person companies looking for sales help, monetization help, strategy, GTM planning, mentoring, teaching, etc. This is where I found happiness in practicality. I could make money, keep my freedom, choose my clients and just be happy.

Here she is. Ready to help you grow your startup grow, acquire new clients, monetize, write content, sell, hire, lead, teach market, raise, and become a well oiled, slim, slow and steady, cash flow positive functioning company, with a big heckin’ side of No BS.

Real recognizes real. Let’s do this.